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Joke of the Day

"If you play a Microsoft CD backwards, you hear satanic messages. That's nothing, because if you play it forwards, it installs Windows"

"A police facial artist tried drawing a suspect's face... It was a bit *sketchy*"

"What do you call a Mexican midget? A paragraph, cause they're to short to be an essay!!!"

"What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Phelps can finish a race"

"How many heroin addicts does it take to change a lightbulb? Four. One to hold the lightbulb and three to smoke until the room starts spinning!"

"What's purple and chained to my front porch? That's my nigger and I'll paint him whatever color I want!"

"Me: (Sigh) There she is. Him: Sounds like you're still carrying a torch for her. Me: Yea, like the villagers carried one for Frankenstein!"

"So I see your name is tiff I should hook you up with my friend gif, he's just like you only a little more animated"

"End Jokes/Quotes from the tv series QI - Season 1 Short quotes and jokes by Stephen Fry at the end of each episode of the show."

"This may seem random, but C Minor... On a related note, E flat."