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Joke of the Day

"Teacher: You seem very well read have you read Shakespeare ? Pupil: No Teacher: What have you read then ? Pupil: Umm I've got red hair !"

"If you swap the fried cheese for cheese, the beer for wine and the cheese art for actual art, Wisconsin is just like France."

"Beware of girls like Princess Peach. She seems cool at first but she ends up in some other dude's castle far too often to be a coincidence."

"What a Chinese Restaurant Owner's Preferred License Plate? 888 MSG"

"ME: someone stole my credit card number BANK: why would they spend $187 at a hot dog stand? ME: [hangs head in shame] that wasn't them"

"Fuuuuck yeah! (shakes pill bottle) Tonight we gonna get completely, totally... (reads label) Antifungal"

"What's the difference between au jus and a jew? Au jus is boiled but a jew is baked."

"I don't know why there has been all this hate lately about trophy hunting exotic animals... As a guy, on a couple of drunken nights I have slayed a few elephants... and a whale."

"My black friend asked me where to find the color copier I said it's 2015 and he can use whatever copier he wants to"

"What's a foot long and slippery? A Slipper. :D"