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Joke of the Day

"Beware of girls like Princess Peach. She seems cool at first but she ends up in some other dude's castle far too often to be a coincidence."

"How to tell someone they have a bad breath nicely ? ""Oh boy I am bored lets brush our teeth"""

"People will hate you, rate you, break you, and shake you. How strong you stand is what makes you.("",)"

"Son and Dad Joke Son: Dad, when i look down i have 4 balls. How is that possible ? Dad: I'm fucking your ass, son."

"I had a parrot that talked . . . but it never said, ""I'm hungry."" So it died."

"Why is it that when a woman sleeps with a bunch of men, she is a slut? But when I do it, suddenly I am gay?"

"Mars: ""hello."" Me: ""Is your water running."" Mars: ""yes."" Me: ""WELL YOU BETTER GO CATCH IT!"""

"1. Put on clown shoes. 2. Sit in toilet stall with feet pulled up. 3. Wait for someone to enter other stall. 4. Slowly lower feet to floor"

"What do you do if a purple elephant and a multicolored horse are following you? get off the merry-go-round! :)"

"Did you hear about the terrorist who was sent to blow up a car? Well, he burned his lips on the exhaust pipe."