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Joke of the Day

"H: Do you like carpet or prefer it bare? M: I'm OK with a little carpet of she shaves the rest H: We're talking about floors M: HR again?"

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"What kind of car did Jesus drive? a manual."
"What do you call a lesbian who drives a Chevy Astro full of penises? A Dick Van Dyke"
"That awkward moment when you realize that the nursery rhyme never said that Humpty Dumpty was an egg..."
"How many ears does Leonard Nimoy have? 3. A left ear, a right ear, and the final frontier."
"What do you call it when you see a smart blonde A dream"
"BoyFriend & GirlFriend BoyFriend : Hey.! Please give me a kiss.. GirlFriend : No, Not before marriage.. BoyFriend : Don't Worry Darling, I am already married.."
"Marriage is like a deck of cards... In the beginning all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you wish you had a club and a spade."
"Was in the hot tub a full 3 minutes before I noticed the floating chipmunk so probably don't ask me questions about a crime scene"
"A woman walks in on the janitor using the women's washroom... ""What are you doing in here?"" ""The men's room is filthy"""
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