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Joke of the Day

"A woman walks in on the janitor using the women's washroom... ""What are you doing in here?"" ""The men's room is filthy"""

"Did you hear about the guy who didn't accomplish anything in his life? Neither did I."

"cocaine jokes cracks me up all the time"

"If Donald Trump becomes President, The rest of us should be able to just walk into any hospital & start working as doctors"

"What do you call an Irish milkshake? Mashed potatoes..."

"What do we want?! AIRPLANE NOISES! When do we want them?! NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"DRIVING ON HIGHWAY Wife: You just missed a right. Me: Thanks babe you just MRS right."

"SHOUTS OUT TO ALL THE BIRDS THAT ARE INCAPABLE OF FLIGHT BUT THEY STILL OUT THERE GRINDIN ANYWAY"

"Reports are now emerging from Russia that Putin rode the meteorite while shirtless, steering it away from a box of kittens."

"Immortality sounded great when I was 23, but now that I'm 38 it just sounds exhausting."