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Joke of the Day

"What did Samsung say after Apple came out of the closet? But I'm gayer and water resistant!"

"Scientists say, six out of seven dwarves are not happy. -- As seen on QI."

"scary Halloween costume idea: eye contact"

"The worst part about working with a bunch of dicks... ...is they tend to rub off on you."

"Wife was talking for a while so I pulled out my iPod & played her off award show style. This did not go over as well as I hoped."

"What's the German super hero called? Ale-Man"

"Hey girl is your dad in jail... ...Because if I was your dad, I would be"

"I'm done drinking for good... Now I drink for Evil."

"What do they say when you leave an abortion clinic in Germany? Al-fetus-zane"

"What's the difference between a peeping Tom and a pick pocket The pick pocket snatches watches"