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Joke of the Day

"me: they're having a special, buy 3 dvds get 1 free wife: so why do you have 4 space jam's? me: ...because it's buy 3 get 1 free"

"Why do neurologists think they're God? Because they can turn any animal into a vegetable!"

"Why is Ian Thorpe gay? He didn't like breast stroke."

"Smiling gives you wrinkles. Resting bitch face keeps you pretty."

"I went into a French restaurant and asked the waitress... 'Have you got frog's legs?' She said, 'No, my jeans are just a bit tight.'"

"Why was simba grounded? Because he was lion! Please. Please kill me.."

"What did the Secret Service agent say to the President-elect when someone tried to take a shot at him? Donald, Duck!"

"Is 6 celebrity impersonations too small a number for me to do on this first date? I feel like its a little low..."

"What do you call the Easter Bunny with fleas? Bugs Bunny"

"Umm..I don't want to be ""that inmate,"" but could you tell the chef that this needs more salt."