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Joke of the Day

"Why was simba grounded? Because he was lion! Please. Please kill me.."

"BANG BANG! Q: Why did the mirror have holes in it? A: A moron kept trying to shoot himself."

"I just found a quarter in the vending machine, if anyone is looking for a sugar mama."

"John Travolta and Nicolas Cage walk into a bar... The barman says, ""Why the wrong face?"""

"Sleeping with prostitutes is like making your dog dance with you on it's hind legs. You know it's wrong, but you try to convince yourself that they're enjoying it too."

"If abortion is murder, then are condoms kidnapping..."

"Why did the crayon want to be a phone? Because it wanted to be a texta."

"""IT'S A BOY"" I shouted... With tears rolling down my face, I shouted out loud. ""I DON'T BELIEVE IT. A BOY!"" It was at that moment I decided never to visit Thailand again."

"Made a folder for my Japanese phone apps... I call them Japps."

"How do deaf mathematicians communicate? Sine language!"