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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend was really excited about sex but said we couldn't because she was on her period... .. I turned back and declared ""The only thing a period stops is a sentence."""

"Where does general keep his armies? In his sleevies."

"Father Christmas lost his umbrella but he didn't get wet! Why not? Because it wasn't raining!"

"Science! A scientist is asked: ""So, how exactly do you make a hormone?"" His response: ""Kick her in the cunt!"""

"Best Porn movie title ever Q:What do you call a Czechoslovakian gay porn movie? A:Czech is in the male. yeah..... As a bonus: This is actually a real movie. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1091755/"

"Why did Harry Potter buy so many golden snitches? Because they were only a quideach"

"What would you name a star wars movie featuring Pluto? This is really just a bad pun, but to me those are the best kind of jokes Pluto strikes from the back and destroys Uranus."

"People always call me unattractive until they see my wallet... then they call me poor too."

"If we all end up going to jail for downloading music...... I at least hope they separate us by music genre."

"Did you hear about the new camouflage turban? It helps you hide and Sikh."