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Joke of the Day

"Your heart! *bursts out laughing* It's an inside joke."

"What a rip-off! I picked up a book called 101 Mating Positions. It turned out to be a book on chess."

"How many tickles does it take to make a squid laugh? Ten tickles."

"What do you call a Mexican with a fake toe Roberto"

"It doesn't matter if you come third in the water olympics... All dives matter."

"Not a fan of APA MLA, however, was love at first cite."

"The Class of 2019"

"Things that just weren't meant to be heated in a microwave: lettuce, mustaches, avocados, sarcasm, other microwaves, oranges. And that's it."

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water. I don't know what they did up there, but they came back with a daughter."

"Husband: ""I have good news and bad news"" Wife: ""Tell me the bad news first."" Husband: ""The washing machine broke."" Wife: ""And the good news?"" Husband: ""The dogs are clean."""