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Joke of the Day
"How do you know if your neighbor is gay? His dick tastes like shit"
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"The first time a girl walked up to me and gave me her number I didn't know what to do so I ate it."
"My first time doing standup was a lot like my first time having sex. I finished way too early and when it was over I couldn't stop apologizing."
"What is the last thing that tickle-me elmo gets before he leaves the factory? Two test tickles"
"A secretary walks into her boss's office and says, ""Can I use your Dictaphone?"" He says, ""No, dial with your finger like everyone else."""
"I've just found out I can have sex at 65 I live at number 59 so it's only a short walk!"
"GUY (whose car died): can u help me? I need a jump ME (pulling a trampoline out of my trunk): im always prepared for emergencies like this"
"Life is that reality show character wearing a leopard print caftan saying ""Yer either gonna love me or hate me, I just tell it like it is"""
"""Update the Force, young Skywalker"" Said Adobe Wan Kenobi."
"They say to never eat your own culinary creations. But I can't help myself, it takes 9 months to make my famous Baby Back Ribs."