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Joke of the Day

"when the news anchor says ""if you know anything about the crime please contact police"" dont call the police and re-tell the news story"

"What is the first sign of spring? Two rednecks carrying a heater into the pawn shop."

"Why couldn't the blonde make icecubes? because she lost the recipe."

"How to make microwave popcorn: 2 minutes 27 seconds-half bag popped. 2 minutes 29 seconds-MICROWAVE ON FIRE."

"My appointment at Gamblers Anonymous is at 25 to 1..."

"What type of MMO's does the Taliban play? RPG's"

"Since only the good die young, I must have the shelf-life of a Twinkie."

"How do you make German potato pancakes? Cook them in the microwave"

"Two satellite antennas decided to get married The wedding was ok. But the reception was amazing!"

"British people must really like Leia in the new Star Wars movie. Stiff upper lip!"