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Joke of the Day

"There are two kinds of people People who can count People who can't count People who are there for no particular reason"

"Apparently Gary Glitter is applying for the Villa manager's job... after hearing the strikers were Bent, Young and possibly Keane"

"Do you hear about the 2 Irish gays? Michael Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzmichael."

"Barista: How do you take your coffee? Me: Orally."

"I buy vodka alone, people give me the ""Enough Vodka?"" look. I buy vodka with 4 kids, people give me the ""Are you sure that's ENOUGH?"" look."

"T NOW! what do we want? MORE TIME-TRAVEL JOKES! when do we want them? RIGH"

"I mostly want a relationship so my boyfriend can chase me around trying to put an ice cube down my back as I demurely beg ""Dooooooooon't."""

"Whats the age of consent in Thailand? 50$"

"What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? Ack, ack, *choke*"

"i'm really good at practicing how to pronounce something on a fancy menu for 10 minutes, then cracking under pressure and saying ""that one."""