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Joke of the Day

"Sure, he's got his faults, like -- he's a necromancer, and a hoarder... ... but doesn't everybody have a few skeletons in their closet?"

Next Joke
 
"I saw your girlfriend kissing another man... - And what she was wearing? -- A White and Gold dress. - Oh she is not, my gf is wearing a black and blue dress"
"I just got early access to the new Injustice: Mods among us."
"Shortest Horror Story: Tomorrow is MONDAY again!"
"Yo mama so ugly that not even goldfish crackers smile back"
"What do you call a graduated spider? A Web Designer"
"""Honey, it's not that I don't like your cooking, it's just that the smoke's about to asphyxiat our family."" ""WHAT'D YOU SAY ABOUT MY ASS??"""
"what are you getting your wife for her birthday? a sweater and a dildo... if she doesnt like the sweater, she can go fuck herself"
"[First Date] Me: So, Construction? Him: Yeah M: You nail stuff? With your big hammer? H: M: Like to screw? H: M: Hey! Where are you going?"
"What a few black wolves and a classic musician have in common? The two are Wolfgang."