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Joke of the Day

"I think my new idea for DIY orthodontics is going to take the world by storm. brace yourself"

"*sneeze once* God bless you! *sneeze twice* God bless you. *sneeze three times* Get your shit together, Steve."

"There is a U.N group set up to help those who're bisexual... B-I-N.G.O!"

"Being an adult is like watching a foreign movie with no subtitles in a crowded theater, everyone else knows what's going on and you just nod"

"After 15 years, I finally met my dad. He's a pharmacist."

"So, this baby seal walks into a club... [o(;_;)o](http://youtu.be/TK2TuqcNWPY?t=30s)"

"What do you do with a Rhinoceros with 3 balls? You walk him and pitch to the giraffe."

"Why did Opey get fired from his job as a pizza delivery boy? Because Opey never delivered."

"A teacher and the students Teacher: What does the chicken give you? Students: eggs! Teacher: What does the pig give you? Students: bacon! Teacher: What does the cow give you? Students: homework!"

"I SCREAM, YOU SCREAM, WE ALL SCREAM, BECAUSE GRANDPA FORGOT TO WEAR HIS HEARING AIDS AGAIN!"