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Joke of the Day

"Little Johnny When I was a boy, I prayed, and prayed, for a bike but never got one. Then I realized that God don't work that way. So I stole a bike, then asked for forgiveness."

Next Joke
 
"It's cute how they show subtitles during Here Comes Honey Boo Boo & pretend that anyone watching might actually know how to read."
"Wow kanye west's website is named kanye west .com .. can you believe the ego on this guy. jeez louise."
"Instead of a flask I keep a small kitten in my jacket pocket that I pull out for a quick pet whenever I need a pick-me-up."
"The movie 'Up' is utter bullshit. I tied 57,000 balloons to my house & my wife didn't die."
"I'm thinking of changing my name to Attention so i can get paid"
"Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off."
"The comedian made an entire audience laugh without speaking a single word No joke"
"What causes dimples? Its how many times your dad poked you in the face when he was fucking your mom when she was pregnant with you"
"6: can i have ice cream? Me: ur room clean? 6: if I clean it can I have ice cream? M: sure 6:*looks at room* thats ok I dont need ice cream"