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Joke of the Day

"I asked my husband: How are you able to stay in bed all morning without getting up to pee? He replied... ...It's hard"

"I have a concrete strip on my front lawn painted to look like a slip n slide and every summer 10 to 15 kids learn a valuable lesson on it."

"I wait til the mailman comes to send all my emails in front of him while keeping eye contact and whispering ""Your end is nigh, letter boy."""

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Cereal ! Cereal who ? Cereal pleasure to meet you !"

"How do trees get on the internet? They log in."

"What do you call a preacher with an erection? A firm believer"

"On your first day as a new parent, walk up to your baby and cry louder than it to assert your dominance."

"My son's taking French and my daughter is learning sign language and now I have no idea what anyone's talking about anymore."

"A car dealership twice the size... ...can offer a whole lot more."

"I feel bad for having sex with my best friend's sister. What's even worse is that my brother is my best friend."