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Joke of the Day

"My urge to sing ""The Lion Sleeps Tonight"" is just a whim away a whim away, a whim away, a whim away"

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"Girlfriend: Have you ever been with a fat chick? Me: Nope, you're the first one. Gf: What? Me: What?"
"How do you make a hotdog with a tree? You fold it"
"They found a hole in the wall at the University's girl's locker room. The police are looking into it."
"Motivating words are harder with autocorrect... - Archive your dreams. - Be excrement to each other. - Nottingham is impossible. - The only thing standing in your way is autocorrect."
"It's rude to ask someone to courtesy flush, so I always offer them an ass mint instead. I'm a gentleman."
"How are black people like Christmas lights? Half of them don't work and the ones that do aren't that bright"
"Dora the Explorer... has a little Muslim friend named Doda... The Exploder."
"What did Mike Tyson say to Vincent Van Gogh? You gonna eat that?"
"Every husband is a farmer by default.. his survival solely depends on ""Agree""culture"