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Joke of the Day
"Why did God create women? To carry semen from the bedroom to the toilet."
Next Joke
"Um, guys, whaddya do with a 5 y.o. at an aquarium who's hysterical because she sees Dory in a tank and I kind of need to know right now."
"The best trick the devil ever pulled was calling herself ""him""."
"What kind of pants do Bostonians wear? Car Keys"
"A student is the only one in the school who can take retests... They say he is remarkable."
"A taxidermist was asked, ""So what do you do for a living?"" She replied, ""Oh you know... stuff."" - *From Tumblr.*"
"What do you call someone that goes down on both genders? Bilingual."
"I can be the man of your dreams... ...if you dream of a man who exposes himself to the elderly on public transport."
"Sometimes I wake up crabby. Sometimes I let her sleep in."
"I just shaved my legs for the first time in 2 weeks so if you will come clean out my tub I won't judge u for making a beautiful rug"