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Joke of the Day

"By my calculations, I've spent approximately $39 throughout my life to watch bananas turn brown on my kitchen table"

"My mum is a midwife and she always messes up jokes... Which is strange, because I thought midwives were great at delivery."

"Why did the dinosaur eat the baby??? It didn't. Humans did not appear until after the extinction of dinosaurs."

"I tried hypnotizing my wife but *cluck* I think *cluck cluck* something went wrong is that *cluck cluck cluck* corn on the ground?"

"Why was the young vampire a failure? Because he fainted at the sight of blood."

"Wile E Coyote: I can't get rid of this headache *TNT explodes* *anvil drops on his head* *bus flattens him* Dr: it's probably stress-related"

"What's the difference between your mom and 3 dicks? Your mom can't take a joke."

"How can you help a starving cannibal? Give them a hand !"

"chevy badge on a holdern upvote if you think they're gay"

"What's the difference... What's the difference between a chef and a perverted aquarium owner? One fixes dishes and the other dicks his fishes."