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Joke of the Day

"A bubble floats into a bar . . . The bartender asks, ""What do you want?"" The bubble says, ""Pop."""

"How do men exercise on the beach? By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini."

"Why couldn't the melons be together? Everyone knows melons cantaloupe."

"I'm not saying I spend a lot of time in the restroom, I'm just saying if you walk into my stall you can be charged with home invasion..."

"Anyone know the exact alcohol content of ""lady humps""? How drunk am I going to get off them?"

"What do you do if you're Fighting a group of circus performers? Go for the juggler"

"The wife asked me, ""When you're on a business trip away, do you think about me?"" Apparently ""Only to stop myself from cumming too quickly"" wasn't the right answer."

"I used to think the brain was the most important organ... Then I thought, look what's telling me that"

"What do you call a feminist that raps about women's rights? Feminem"

"I dunno if a gun would be my murder weapon of choice but it's worth a shot."