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Joke of the Day

"[Job Interview] Boss: What is your best trait? Me: Procrastination. B: How is that a positive? M: I'll give you my reasons. Later."

"Did you hear about the local electrician? His rates are Shocking."

"My friends all judge me for being a heroin addict... I guess they just don't like strong women"

"Today I saw a homeless man pick up a brochure for a computer repairer. I guess he's having computer problems?"

"Where did they hang Speedy Gonzalez? At the pico de gallows."

"What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? pt 2 A boomer-WRONG!"

"A feminist and a fascist walks into a bar She orders a glass of wine"

"This joke I made up while in the shower What's the difference between my shower and everyone? My shower gets turned on by me."

"Is that a gun in your pocket or are you happy to see me? Both! Now get in the fucking van."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Courtney Pine ! Courtney Pine who ? Courtney Pine tables I need a new one !"