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Joke of the Day

"How does a yoga instructor turn down an invite? Namaste home tonight."

"Rednecks can't describe large areas as expansive... Listeners will just wonder why they paid so much for it."

"What's a pirates favorite letter? Them: R You: No, its the C!!!!"

"I will not believe a thing posted on this entire website tomorrow (today for some of you in the world) Fucking April 1ST."

"Two Irish schoolboys... 1: Hey, Pat! What's the craic? 2: Not much, Brian. I had a pint yesterday. 1: Oh! Really? I thought you were only 15? 2: I am! 1: So what was it? Guiness? 2: No, it was water."

"You hear in his will Prince left a bunch of large musical instruments to churches? Turns out he was *a big organ donor.*"

"Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint"

"I don't believe in stereotypes. Because that would mean all Asians would be driving big or expensive vehicles to make up for their penis size."

"I've got the body of a twenty year old. It's in the trunk of my car."

"How many redditors does it take to change a lightbulb? One. One to change it and his girlfriend to give him a blowjob when he's done."