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Joke of the Day

"[date] Her: so you're a mathematician? Me: no actually I'm a *pythagorean doves fly out of my sleeve and hit her in the face* mathemagician"

"What comes before OP? QWERTYUI"

"What is an Arkansas virgin? A girl who can run faster than her brothers."

"Yes I get laid because I'm an illusionist. But I don't use ""magic"" or ""tricks"" on women. They respect my skills & choose to make love with m"

"I feel like when life gives me lemons I just give them back because I hate holding stuff."

"What do you call a short Mexican? A paragraph"

"How many perverts does it take to change a lightbulb? 69"

"Junk is something that you've kept for years & throw away 3 weeks before you need it."

"What's the worst part about being a black Jew? You have to sit in the back of the oven."

"Help is a magic word. Say it to people & watch them disappearing from the horizon of your life."