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Joke of the Day

"Signs your wife is cheating: 1. Weird cologne 2. Emotional distance 3. Late-night abences 4. She introduces you to her boyfriend"

"Why did the 3d modeler need back surgery? He injured his spline!"

"Boss: ""Sarcasm will get you nowhere in life""!! Me: ""Well It got me to the 'International Sarcasm' finals in Santiago 2011 Boss: ""Really""? Me: ""No"""

"What's the penalty for bigamy? Two mothers-in-law."

"I hate One Direction fans... Oscillating ones cool down a room much better."

"You know that you are ghetto when you can fit 110 words into 140 characters."

"Mad Cow Disease Q: Why do cows get the mad cow disease? A: Anyone would go mad if someone squeezes your tits four times a day, but only let you have sex once an year!"

"How do you circumcise a hillbillly? Kick his sister in the chin."

"our teacher used to make us do 100 lines if we'd been naughty. my nose was wrecked at the end of it"

"Got my new Chinese cookbook today....""101 Ways to Wok Your Dog"""