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Joke of the Day

"Why did the Irishman only put 239 beans in his bean soup? Because one more would be too farty"

"How does a Scotsman find a sheep in tall grass? Very Satisfying"

"If you feel like someone is playing mind games with you, they totally are and you should kill them before they kill you."

"Porn addiction is a serious thing I have first hand experience."

"Beware of Lawyers 7 ""Are!you!a!lawyer?"" ""Yes."" ""How!much!do!you!charge?"" ""A!hundred!dollars!for!four!questions."" ""Isn't!that!awfully!expensive?"" ""Yes.!What!is!your!fourth!question?"""

"What do you get if you cross a cow with a camel? A lumpy milkshake."

"How to pick up women: 1-approach beautiful lady 2-bend at the knees 3-lift gently 4-oh god she's screaming 5-put her down the cops are here"

"Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because fuck you"

"I'll put a comma, after a comma, even if it doesn't need a comma, to completely, drive you, insane."

"Child services told me to stop using cigarettes as they are harming my children Fair enough, I'll just use an Ash tray"