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Joke of the Day
"I'm reading a book about anti-gravity I just can't put it down!"
Next Joke
"What do you call a vampire who owns a restaurant? Count Spatula"
"A grasshopper sits at the bar... ...and the bartender says, ""Hey, we have a drink named after you!"" The grasshopper says, ""You have a drink named Steve?"""
"I used to listen to old Mitch Hedberg recordings.. I still do, I just used to too."
"Where do ghosts go for their holidays? The Dead Sea."
"I plan on starting a geek rap band... I think I'll call it Run-D.L.L."
"I saw a police helicopter last night... ""Hey look, a flying pig""."
"I will not mess up this omelet.. I will not mess up this omelet.. I will not mess up this omelet.. I will enjoy my scrambled eggs."
"A limerick for Guildford in Surrey At McDonald's in Guildford in Surrey I spilt coffee on my crotch in a scurry I had to act quick To cool down my dick So I stuck it into my McFlurry"
"I dumped my blind fiance yesterday. She never saw it coming."