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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a lesbian with big fingers? Well hung."

"""Please don't put a million dumb photos of me on your Facebook... it just annoys your friends"" Every baby"

"'NSFW' Why didn't Mrs. Claus ever have kids? Because Santa always comes down the chimney."

"A Brit, a Jew and a Canadian. So a Brit, a Jew and a Canadian are sitting in bar. The jew lifts his head from his drink and says, ""I just don't know anymore, does america got talent?"""

"How many Will Ferrell's does it take to change a light bulb? One, AND IT'S NOT FUNNY!"

"One time I invited a guy over for dinner but I didn't feel like cooking so I just poured us each a bowl of cereal really romantically."

"If you stop water with a dam... ...do you stop holy water with a goddamn? If you psychically stop holy water for a living, can you mind your own goddamn business? -&y (Yes i wrote that myself)"

"Why do many people call my penis the 'Big Mac'? Because it doesn't look as good or as big as it did in the adverts. :("

"Where do you go to meet the best fish? It doesn't matter - any old plaice will do."

"What did the thirsty Spanish pirate say? I need some arrrrrrrrrrrgua!"