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Joke of the Day

"Why did the worlds shortest feminist burn down a post shop? Because the mail was always above her."

"Joke - I asked God I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness."

"Got let out of prison today. The warden turned and asked ""can you take any positives from your time in here?"" I smiled ""Yeah actually, the wife can't ever call me a tight arsed bastard again"""

"You're like school in the summer... No class."

"What has four legs and goes ""Oom! Oom!""? A cow walking backwards!"

"Where did Susie go when her town got bombed? Everywhere."

"My son asked me to explain women to him so I told him we'd go to lunch and talk about it, then spent the next 3 hours getting dressed."

"What's the difference between a kitten and your wife? You actually want to cuddle a kitten after you fuck it."

"Contest in a girl's college write a short story which contains religion, sex and mystery. Winner's story Oh god I am pregnant I wonder who did it"

"My wife and i got along so much better... When we were just brother and sister"