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Joke of the Day
"I used to perform circumcisions for a living. I got tons of tips."
Next Joke
"Pal: On your date, go to a French restaurant. And remember! Girls love a wine connoisseur. Later... Me: we'll both have the wine connoisseur"
"Why do astronauts bring their phone into space? Because they can get 4g"
"why don't foot fetishists ever win anything? because they like the taste of defeat. i'm not even sorry."
"Three people I never mess with:n1- PMSing women.n2- Truck drivers.n3- PMSing truck drivers."
"I just accidentally put my mic too close to my guitar amp and I think I made a Skrillex song."
"Exactly how many good deeds do you have to commit to get into Heaven? I'm talking bare minimum here."
"In the 50's, a small city granted a two-singer a capella team exclusive rights to perform on street corners. Other street performers sued. They claimed it was a doo-wop-poly."
"Hey mate! Your girl looks like a horse... Are you in a stable relationship?"
"I farted in church today..... I farted in church today and four people spun around in their seats and looked at me. I felt like I was on the Voice!"