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Joke of the Day

"Want to avoid making excuses when people ask you to hang out? Always say no when someone asks ""wanna hear something amazing?"""

"Did you hear about the holocaust museum banning Pokemon? I guess they didn't want a bunch of Ash running around."

"an advice to every dad,if you wanna see your children just turn the router off,they will suddenly appear.btw ur neighbor might come as well."

"What do you call a Nebraskan who hates Obama? A CORNservative."

"I just saw a group of pandas pooping on the ground together What an embarrassment"

"If Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump were in a car crash, who would survive? America"

"I can finally scratch ""murdering an anonymous vagrant"" off my bucket list. I didn't do it, it just doesn't seem all that appealing anymore I guess."

"THe newiest Knock Knock joke I heard. - Knock Knock - Who's there? - First pilot. hopefully not too soon"

"What's green and smells like bacon? Kermit's finger."

"What is Bill Clintons favorite instrument to play? His Whore-Monica"