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Joke of the Day

"Why is it called a funny bone? Because its humerus!"

"All pills are sleeping pills if you take enough of them."

"Was watching family feud, I don't think The announcer was N'SYNC"

"Him: Would you like to have lunch sometime? Me: I like to have lunch every afternoon."

"I stole a seat from an old man and he remarked, ""Chivalry is Dead"". I said, ""I'm sorry, I didn't know. He wasn't even trending on Twitter""."

"Speed dating (Don't say anything embarrassing) ""So do you ever eat raisins and then later poop rehydrated grapes?"" (DAMMIT!)"

"If Monday was a movie, it would be very long and boring."

"My niece just yelled ""MY DINNER IS BETTER THAN YOUR DINNER"" so I looked over and she was eating doritos with a fork"

"Are you lactose intolerant? If so, you won't be able to handle this cheesy joke"

"""Have you heard about the new pirate movie?"" ""It's rated aaarrrrrrrr."""