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Joke of the Day

"Guy calls to HR: - Hi. I'd like to discuss IT security specialist position at your company. - Ok. Send your CV, please. - You already have it at your desktop."

"I park in the farthest spot possible at the gym for the added benefit of eating my croissan'wich without being judged by people walking by."

"If this Hillary case blows up... It will be the second time a weiner has ruined the presidency for a Clinton"

"A Man's Biggest Hope Most men hope they will marry a nymphomaniac. The problem is, that after a few years, the nympho leaves but the maniac is still there."

"If I'm ever on life support, unplug me, let me sit for 15-30 secs, plug me back in and see if that works."

"Son: Dad, how do stars die? Dad: Drugs, usually."

"What kind of pictures does a mermaid take on her phone? Shelfies."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Bo ! Bo who ? Bo Geste !"

"What does Snoop Dogg eat when he visits Montreal? Smoked Meat Every Day."

"I'm not worried about Muslim suicide bombers They can only do it once. Those Hindu suicide bombers are the real threat."