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Joke of the Day

"""Honey, am I fat?"" ""No, not at all"" ""You're lying"" ""I swear. By the way, you got something on your chin... no, the other one"""

"You must be twins. You're too stupid to be one person. #MyBestInsult"

"What's the difference between a cockerel and a prostitute? A cockerel says cock-a-doodle-do. Whereas a prostitute says any-cock-will-do."

"I gave my girl an orgasm and she spat it right back in my face"

"The only time my girl friend will ever scream ""DEEPER, DEEPER""... ...is when they are lowering my casket into the ground!"

"Developers don't spoon their SO They fork them."

"The best jokes are the ones you have to explain. It's funny because the best jokes are the ones you *don't* have to explain."

"I lost my watch at a party the other night It fell in my drink. I guess it's drinking time."

"New Game Here's a new game we can all play! You have to use a long mallet to hit frozen potato treats through hoops on a field. All while dressed as a frontiersman I call it Croquette Crockett Croquet"

"[NSFW] Do you know what really brings out the child in me? A miscarriage."