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Joke of the Day

"The best jokes are the ones you have to explain. It's funny because the best jokes are the ones you *don't* have to explain."

"Brain: stop eating! Me: why B: you'll get fat M: so? B: there's only enough vodka to catch a buzz on an empty stomach! M: oh *stops eating*"

"What's the most dangerous possession a gun nut will ever own? His car."

"The new guy at work has been getting a lot of customer complaints lately. Probably because I wear his name tag when he's not there."

"[GoT joke] A Stark, a Baratheon and a Lannister walk into an inn and everyone you love DIES!!"

"Misunderstandings happen when one person is clearly stupid."

"The teacher asked what comes after the number 69... The student replies, ""Mouthwash."""

"girl are u a hyperlink in an email from my grandma, because I think u gave me a serious virus"

"Why did the man angrily throw out his alarm clock this morning? Because it reminded him of Jonathan Clock the man who raped his wife the night before."

"When the wife and kids go on vacation, I always keep the neighbors on edge by placing rectangular mounds of dirt throughout the yard."