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Joke of the Day

"...and the award for best lead actress in a dramatic role goes to me for ""I Have A Sinus Infection, Why Don't You Care That I'm Dying"""

"A physicist sees a young man about to jump off the Empire State Building... He yells ""Don't do it! You have so much potential!"""

"What do you call a midget mexican? A paragraph since he isn't a full essay"

"Here's to the kisses that I snatched, and Vice versa. Bottoms up fellas."

"Lawyer: ""What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?"" Defendent: ""Gucci Sweats and Sum Jordan's"""

"how do you get a 100 cows into a barn? put up a Bingo sign!"

"Money is the root of all evil, until the collection plate comes around"

"If Bill Gates had a penny for every time I had to reboot my computer ...oh wait, he does."

"Policeman: Why were you speeding? Motorist: I was trying to get away from the crime scene."

"I went to a nudist casino... ...I lost my shirt at the poker tables."