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Joke of the Day

"[First day of class at law school] *raises hand* Hi, yes. When do we get our white, curly wigs?"

"I went to a chyropracter today Oops, I meant a chiropractor. I stand corrected."

"Switzerland is a pretty sweet country... and their flag's a big plus."

"What do you call a boring taco? Aburrido."

"[showing colleague a pic on phone] ""NO! Don't scroll left!"" My face falls as he sees my erotic photo collection of donuts on plates."

"Where does a Muslim learn to swim? Inshallah water."

"Veterinarian- You're here to discuss your dog's salivation? Me- No. My dog's a good dog, he'll go to Heaven! I'm here about his slobbering."

"Had to be a woman that coined the phrase ""severance package."" No guy is putting those two words so close to each other."

"Yo momma so dumb... my yoghurt is more cultured than her."

"What's the secret to a great joke The timing. The timeing."