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Joke of the Day

"Apparently. white is the new black... Just ask the Spokane NAACP"

"I was dismissed from my responsibilities as church usher because I kept using finger guns to point out available seats. * pew pew *"

"When is a school paper not a school paper? When it's turned into the teacher."

"How was copper wire invented? Two Jews found the same penny."

"Self-control (n.): Charlize Theron keeping a straight face on when the mirror tells her Kristen Stewart is prettier than she is."

"*lowers car suspension to look more gangster* *takes 12 minutes to ride over a speedbump*"

"I was disappointed by the British version of Breaking Bad. It ends after he gets cancer and all his treatment is paid for by the NHS."

"Data's joke from Star Trek:TNG, please finish it: ""A monk a clone and a ferengi decided to go bowling together."""

"I love you guys with all my ass. I would say heart, but my ass is bigger."

"I was invited to a party... The dress code said ""black tie only"". But when I got there, I noticed other people had worn shirts and trousers too"