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Joke of the Day

"Every website requiring subscription would like to wish you a Happy Birthday today!"

"Did you hear about the transformer who lost his ability to change into a seven-sided shape? He's a de-septagon."

"An app.. An app that reminds you, no matter how ugly you are.. someone far far away wants to bang you. -Twitters new slogan"

"They're marketing headphones specifically for gorillas now Rumor has it they'll be called Harambeats. I'm so sorry."

"Now I don't know if this is racist but a black guy walks into a bar.... The barman goes 'wow where'd you get that?' To which the parrot goes 'Africa'"

"What do hobbits secretly call Gandalf when he drinks too much ? The White Wizzer"

"Ordered ribs so I'd have to put my phone down. Discovered new talent. Pinky scroll"

"Why was Noah the best businessman? He floated his stock while the rest of the world was in liquidation. The greatest journalist? Samson. He took two columns and made an impression on everyone."

"I emailed Hillary that to secure a win, she had to pick Bernie as VP. I guess she deleted it."

"When you're enjoying your Chow mein.. ..but you miss your dog."