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Joke of the Day

"If your dad wrote the Bible, who would he have building the ark? Not sure who he would have, but I Noah guy."

"10yo: When in doubt, albatrout. Me: What the hell is albatrout? That's not real. 10yo: Now you're in doubt! Me: But... 10yo: ALBATROUT"

"What if your pillow could collect your dreams and when you wake up, You could plug it into your computer And watch them over again."

"What did Adele say when the chicken crossed the road? Hello from the other side..."

"The son comes out to his dad The son says to his dad: Dad, I am gay. His dad says: You're not gay. Elton John is gay. You're a morose son of a bitch."

"You hear the one about the transgender student? He spent his Junior year a broad."

"Just got Lasik. 20/20 would do again."

"Shia LaBeouf is what happens when you name your child from a random rack of Scrabble tiles."

"Your password must contain an upper and lower case letter, two numbers and a bunch of symbols that look like comic strip swearing."

"I'm not saying you're a jackass but... You're the kind of guy who would buy Anne Frank a drum set."