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Joke of the Day

"This hot girl asked me to recommend some music so i said Pink Floyd, she said ""I didn't know Pink used her last name as well"" Now she's dead"

"Before records were invented, people used to say: u sound like an opera singer that keeps repeating himself"

"I woke up with a horse's head in my bed. And straw. And the rest of the horse's body. And cows. And a tractor. And this is a barn, I guess."

"What do you call someone who has 6.02 * 10^23 dollars? A mole-ionaire."

"The god of time is going back to school to upgrade. Time will take its course"

"What's the difference between a whore and a prostitute? One of them is a paid professional and the other one's your mom."

"What's the difference between a tiny penis and a joke? My date didn't laugh at my jokes."

"Jury remains deadlocked in the case of Good Times v. Bad Times"

"This fly in my car is going to be very disappointed when it ends up at Walmart."

"I only have one hand.... So i shop at secondhand stores."