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Joke of the Day

"After my tweet conversation with you, I delete everything I wrote so you look like a crazy stalker."

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"Last night I ate 3 large spicy curry rolls while watching Westworld. These violent delights have violent ends."
"Polceman: ""I'm afraid that I'm going to have to lock you up for the night."" Man: ""What's the charge?"" Polceman: ""Oh there's no charge. It's all part of the service."
"I asked my Nan what she wanted for Christmas. ""Something from the Body Shop please,"" she replied..... Hope she's got enough room in the flat for the front wing off a Mondeo."
"A Hindu and Muslim together makes for a surprise equillibrium Muslim keep beheading the Hindu. The Hindu keeps reincarnating."
"What Does a Gynecologist and a Pizza worker have in common? They both get to smell it, but neither gets to eat it."
"Why doesn't Moses buy beer? He brews it."
"In order to promote progress I think the next session of congress should be sent to the moon. I just feel that they would make a greater impact."
"How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A.I.D.S."
"What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? ""DAM!"""