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Joke of the Day

"A cop pulls over Heisenburg, and says... Do you know you were going 100 miles per hour? Heisenburg then replied, exasperatedly, ""Dammit, now I'm lost!"""

"Went bass fishing the other day Caught a subwoofer this big!"

"I'd offer to help with your website... ...but it's not really my domain."

"Young riders pick a destination and go... Old riders pick a direction and go."

"I used to wonder what it'd be like to read other people's minds. Then I got a Twitter account, and I'm over it."

"""OPEN THE DOOR IT'S THE POLICE"" who is it? ""POLICE"" what is a police *cops start whispering* ""how does he not know what a police is"""

"What's red and orange and looks great on hippies? Napalm"

"Nephew: What's love? Me: Well, all the women text you except the one you like. And it hurts, so we drink. Sister: Get away from him!"

"The other day a co- worker asked me what I had for lunch, and I replied 5 Guys. He laughed because it sounds funny. I guess I should have been more specific and said I got bukaked during lunch time."

"Why do Anarchists only drink herbal tea? Because all proper tea is theft."