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Joke of the Day

"My daughter is at that age where she has started asking awkward questions about sex... Like, ""Is that all you fucking got?"""

"Did you hear about the Scarecrow that won an award? It was for being outstanding in his field."

"My love life is like my video game I always play single player, and I can never find anyone who wants to play co-op"

"Can't believe I've already spent $500 on mayonnaise this year."

"I was asked where I see myself in fives at a job interview Apparently ""riding your mom"" was not the right answer"

"If your mule ate my prize winning bird, what would you have? My 3 foot cock in your ass!"

"Two men walk into a bar.... The third one ducks."

"What did your last slave die of? A perforated colon."

"why didn't jimmy drive the tractor? Because he had no legs. Why didn't he have any legs? Because he was a potato."

"""Hey, your fly's down"" Oh shit.. *pets fly's head* you'll be alright little buddy, chin up.. we'll get you some new wings"