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Joke of the Day
"Can't believe I've already spent $500 on mayonnaise this year."
Next Joke
"Do you know why cops don't like to find winos that have been dead for more than two hours? The Ripple is flat."
"Today my family is celebrating my dad's 100 days w/o alcohol he is in a coma"
"NSFW Hey girl, are you a doctor? I need to speak to one because you've given me an erection that's lasted longer than 4 hours."
"I Love You!! Is that you or your beer talking? Thats me.. talking to my beer"
"What's a superheroes favorite narcotic? Heroine"
"OMG, GODZILLA IS COMING TO ATTACK NEW ENGLAND AND WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE-oh, he said huge blizzard, not lizard... Carry on then."
"Who Saw Him Go? by Wendy Leeve"
"No pain no gain but also no pain no pain."
"When your coworker tells you they are getting a divorce a high five is not the right answer. Or so I've been told. Twice now."