145586

Joke of the Day

"What did the erotic novel author get from his editor? Sticky notes. What did he get from his publisher? A hard copy."

"Gf:Do u love me? Me:Yes. Gf:Why do u love me? Me:You're the best. Gf:I'm the best at what? Me:Asking questions. Gf: Like what? Me:..."

"You better lock your doors tonight, person who taught my parents texting."

"A member of the Army Corps of Engineers was working on the design of the bottom of an android ""What exactly is going on?"", I asked. He replied, ""A Major engineering feet."""

"Anytime I see a person wrapped in a Snuggie, I think, that's a person I could easily set on fire."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Cameron ! Cameron who ? Cameron film are needed to take pictures !"

"What do you get if you combine a sheep and a kangaroo? A woolly jumper."

"[spoken while holding in a huge bong rip] i'll take a shower when the market demands it"

"What do you call a Jamaican motorcycle? Bob Harley"

"I said ""no"" to a lot of things this year without giving them a chance. In 2016 I plan on saying ""maybe"" more and then changing it to ""no""."