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Joke of the Day

"I can tell exactly how much someone weighs by how much noise they make when I push them down the stairs."

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"What three letters in the alphabet frighten criminals? F.B.I."
"Sober Irishman"
"Sometimes, when I'm bored, I tell my mother-in-law to relax."
"Caught my Vegan roommate... Caught my Vegan roommate crying today while chopping onions. These people are taking it too far now!"
"What's the difference between a radical feminist and a suicide bomber? One's being triggered and one's pulling the trigger."
"What do Mexicans call a commando? A Juan man army..."
"If your girl tells you ""Deeper!"" and that's all you got, just start reading poetry."
"I like my women how I like my cars Safe and reliable"
"What do you call a rapping computer? Mac-klemore"
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