143589

Joke of the Day

"When I woke up this morning I was like, ""I really can't stay"" but my bed was like, ""Baby, it's cold outside."""

"Did you hear about the guy who got his left side cut? He's all right now!"

"If you get nervous when the IT support desk takes control of your computer remember they're whispering ""no weirdos please"" to themselves."

"What's the difference between a drug dealer and a prostitute. The prostitute can wash her crack and sell it again Edit-1 hopefully she/he washes it"

"A butcher married a baker and had a kid who grew up to be what? Fat."

"OUCH I HAVE A FOOT CRAMP You're dehydrated [Walks on toes] Drink some water [Crawls on knees] Drink water [Lays on floor] Water- [Dies]"

"A guy called into work and says, ""Hey, boss! What's the difference between work and your daughter?"" ""I'm not coming into work this morning!"""

"A Limerick There was a young man from Belgrave, Who found a dead whore in a cave, He said ""It's disgusting"", But she only needs dusting, Just think of the money I'll save!"

"Ordered ribs so I'd have to put my phone down. Discovered new talent. Pinky scroll"

"What do you call a Canadian group of racists? The Ku Kanux Klan."