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Joke of the Day
"If a gay man gets into a debilitating car accident... is he a fruit or a vegetable?"
Next Joke
"What do you call a man with a disfigured penis and a woman with a large vagina? Bendidick Cumbersnatch"
"If I'm extra friendly and super sweet when I see you again, it's cause I've forgotten your name"
"Remember the game where you would take turns yelling, ""Penis!"" in public? Life was so simple before 9/11."
"A mite is sitting on a fly. Fly: Hey, bug on my back, are you a mite? Mite: I mite be. Fly: Stupidest pun I ever heard. Mite: What do you expect? I just made it up on the fly."
"Its so awkward meeting new people. Especially when they go in for a handshake and you go in for an open-mouth kiss."
"What are Asian Tennis Players most well known for? The Back Hand"
"Whenever someone holds my baby & he makes even a tiny peep, I yell ""WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY BABY WHY ARE YOU BURNING MY BABY!?"""
"[goes to museum of fine art] ""Just how fine can this art be, anyway"" [sees a vase in a thong] ""oh damn"""
"Business plan: 1) Spend 20 years mastering karate 2) Teach karate class, so you meet people who don't know karate 3) Rob them"