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Joke of the Day
"Went to Big Lots with a $100 gift certificate and they just handed me the keys to the store."
Next Joke
"Rape jokes aren't funny. They're always forced."
"What happened to the lizard in the wizard's garden pond? He had him newt-ered."
"A man walks up to a girl in a bar and says ""You remind me of my little toe"" . She says, ""Is that because I'm small and cute?"" He says, ""No, its because I'm going to bang you on the table later"""
"My voicemail message is just me sighing for 20 minutes."
"If Reese Witherspoon married Bill Withers ...she'd have to give up the poon."
"Wife asked what was on the TV... I said ""dust"". That's when the fight started."
"In an act of great philanthropy, Chuck made a very generous donation to the American Cancer Society. He donated 6,000 dead bodies for scientific research."
"BREAKING: Pot calls kettle ""black"". ""Racial tension at boiling point"" says mayor of kitchen cupboard"
"Q: What did the leopard say when it ate the man? A: That hit the spot."